You’ve suspected for days, maybe weeks. Something is wrong or off between you and your spouse, and you’re beginning to wonder if maybe they might be…. NO! That’s not possible. Other people have affairs, not you two; what you have is special. Then again there was that thing last week, and when you brought it up, your spouse twisted it around as if YOU were the one with the jealousy issue! ”You’re just being paranoid–you’re crazy for thinking like that!” they said. Still there’s that nagging doubt in your mind.
Here are some of the signs of a spouse that may be cheating. These behaviors are only some of the indicators of a cheating spouse! If your spouse has one or two of these behaviors, and there is a legitimate reason and a mutual agreement (such as you two talk about it and agree to try to lose weight…and they’ve gone a little obsessive about it), these signs do NOT prove infidelity. But when you observe several, or maybe MOST, of these behaviors, your marriage may be in trouble! Again, let me reiterate that these behaviors are only some of the indicators of an affair–to see “ALL the Signs Your Spouse May be Cheating,” please click on the link to see our article!
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The Classic Clue:
When you see lipstick on your husband’s shirt or strange hairs on their clothing or in the car.
1–Some of the ‘Gut Instinct’ signs:
- The telltale sign of a cheating spouse? Having to ask that question in the first place.
- Your intuition (gut feeling) tells you that something is not right.
2–Some of the ‘Behavior That Is Not Their Usual Character’ signs:
- When your partner shows up without their wedding ring
- When your mate becomes suddenly forgetful and you have to tell him/her everything several times; their thoughts are obviously elsewhere.
- When your wife sleeps with her purse by the bed.
- When they encourage you to have a social life and go places out of town, and it seems like they’re trying to get you “out of the house.”
3–Some of the ‘Birth Control’ signs:
- When you find birth-control pills in the medicine cabinet, and you’ve had a vasectomy -OR-
- When you find condoms in the car or in his pockets, and you are on the pill.
4–Some of the ‘Showering/Cologne’ signs:
- When they arrive home and head straight into the shower or bath, and they work an office job.
- When he or she has worn the same fragrance for years, and suddenly they are wearing something new and wearing MUCH more than usual.
5–Some of the ‘Uncomfortable Around You’ signs:
- When your mutual friends start acting strangely toward you, because they either know about the cheating or have been told stories about what a horrible spouse you are.
- When your spouse avoids social events with you, as if they want to cover up that they are with you.
6–Some of the ‘Electronic Clues’ signs:
Email clues~
- When your spouse spends all their time on the email, checking their email, or fooling with email somehow.
- When your husband or wife suddenly deletes all emails from the email account (and it’s not just a clean up) and in the past they used to let them accumulate.
Cell phone clues~
- When you aren’t allowed to ever look at or use their cell phone, and they go to great lenghts to make certain their cell is not answered by you.
- When your spouse is secretive about their cell phone and it is on their person 24/7, and they are on it talking or texting that whole time.
Computer signs~
- When they stay up to “work” or “play a game” on the computer after you go to bed. Excessive internet usage, especially late at night, is a red flag.
- When your spouse will not allow you access to their computer or they suddenly shut down the computer when you walk into the room.
7–Some of the ‘Things Are Just Different at Home’ signs:
- When he/she shows a sudden interest in a different type of music that they really disliked before.
- When he/she has a definite change in attitude towards everyone in the home…including the children.
- When they talk to you they treat you abusively or with disdain, disrespect or excessive sarcasm. Or. . . they may begin to find fault in everything you do in an attempt to justify their affair.
8–Some of the ‘Lots and Lots of Changes’ signs:
- When s/he joins the gym and begins a rigorous workout program and “hated” exercise before.
- Her: When she gets spiffed up and dresses provocatively to “go grocery shopping” or to “get her hair done.” She may also show up with a sudden change of hair style. Him: When he showers, shaves (cologne, deodorant, etc.) and dresses up more than usual to “go out with his buddies” or to “go fishing.”
9–Some of the ‘Telephone Mannerisms That Are Different’ signs:
- When your phone bills show unexplained toll or long distance charges. Often you’ll find one phone number listed excessively.
- When they behave differently or end the telephone call abruptly when you enter the room…or appear to hang up quickly.
10–Some of the ‘Automobile Related Clues That Something is Up’ signs:
- When you find suspicious items in the car like phone numbers, receipts, lipstick, condoms or strange hairs in the vehicle.
- When s/he “goes to the store for groceries” or “goes to get some gas” or “goes to the bank” (a task that should take just a few minutes) and comes home 5 hours later.
- When you notice increased gas purchases that are inconsistent with the amount of miles on the car.
11–Some of the ‘Paper Trails of a Cheating Spouse’ signs:
- When you find credit card receipts for gifts you didn’t receive -OR- your credit card bills itemizes gifts you didn’t receive (such as florist or jewelry).
- When you find ATM receipts bearing a time/date stamp from a city you don’t recognize. [Cheating costs money! To play you must pay.]
- When they begin to volunteer to go to the post office, rushes to check the mail before you do or opens up a new P.O. box perhaps without even telling you.
12–Some of the ‘Sex Tip-offs That Something’s Wrong’ signs:
- When s/he is no longer interested in sex, or s/he makes excuses for its infrequency.
- When your spouse starts to request kinky or other erotic sexual activity (behavior) that you’ve never done before, including watching porn.
13–Some of the ‘Work-related Clues That They May Be Cheating’ signs:
- When they supposedly work a lot of overtime, but it never shows up on the pay stub.
- When you find out by accident he or she took vacation day or personal time off from work – but supposedly worked on those days.
14–Things you’ll hear:
1. “We are just friends.”
2. “I need you to respect my privacy.”
3. “I Love You But I’m Not In Love With You.”
4. “I need some space to figure out my feelings.”
Related articles
- Top 12 Tips to Tell if Your Husband is Cheating on You (blogs.lawyers.com)
- 10 signs he (or she) is cheating (timesunion.com)
- Cheating Suspicions: How to Handle Them Properly (socyberty.com)
- Top 10 Ways to Tell if Your Wife is Cheating on You (blogs.lawyers.com)