When people say “God is my Husband” or “Jesus is Enough”

 Heart Puzzle

I was reading “Is Jesus Really Enough?” by Lilly Grace, and her blog really got me thinking.  In fact, it inspired me so much I wanted to write about it!  

My “blog sister” Lilly Grace is in a difficult marriage–her husband reminds me of Abigail’s first husband, Nabal.  He is not loving and gentle and kind toward her, but she doesn’t give up.  I would say I’m in a difficult marriage, but not because my husband is abusive or because our marriage is sexless!  Nope, my Dear Hubby who writes here often is a WONDERFUL man and a loving husband, but my Dear Hubby is very ill and so I do have many things I have to do “by myself” where others might have their spouse to support them.  And I’m sure that many of you here who read my blog can relate–if your spouse is committing adultery, whether it’s an emotional affair or a physical affair, your marriage is DIFFICULT.  It can feel very lonely.  You may not have your spouse there for you.  Your Disloyal Spouse is probably angry, abusive, deceptive, dishonest, and hurtful.  Chances are good that your sex life is suffering, and you miss the hugs and kisses and loving physical touches.  

But I still hate it when people say cliche kind of responses like these because they don’t really HELP. I don’t need some meaningless cliche–I need some understanding, sympathy or at least something that’s actually helpful! LOL I will say one thing about these sayings though: they aren’t utterly inaccurate.

To me, when I think of “God is my husband” what I truly, honestly think of in my head is that as a woman, I want a male person to treat me with love and kindness and gentleness, and God is not a male human in flesh and blood in front of me. But when I think about marriage, I think that it is an image of the way God wants to be with us…with ME. Marriage reflects the intimate knowledge of one male person to one female person–full, deep, true KNOWING and BEING KNOWN with covenant commitment to each other. This is what God wants: He wants me to fully, deeply, truly know Him and been known by Him.  He wants covenant commitment to each other. And in that sense, He is my Husband.  

Likewise, I think of “Jesus is enough” I think of Jesus, who is fully the Maker and Creator of the Universe, but who humbled Himself and took on flesh. He was fully GOD, but he experienced the hunger, tiredness, frustration, limitation and yes physical sexual hormones and everything that comes with a human body…and He voluntarily gave Himself to torture and death to atone for us! If He can endure that for us, then yes, I can endure what physical discomforts this short time here on earth  may give me, even if it’s being horny or without sex.  After all, the point of sex is not “to relieve my horny physical itch” but to physically share in the pleasure of my spouse and serve them!  My focus in sex is on intimacy and on my spouse.  

And the last thing I think of is actually adultery, and I think of that because so often we think of our little pain or our loneliness or our lack of sex and try to justify to ourselves “Well, God would want me to be happy” or some such nonsense.  But in real life, marriage is a mirror of our relationship to God (as the Bride of Christ)…and adultery is a mirror of our relationship to God before Christ!  He loved us, as a husband loves his bride, and we “cheated” on Him by loving other gods and chasing them rather than being faithful to Him.  We were rageful, hateful, deceptive, dishonest, and followed our lusts–and despite all that, God kept His covenant with us and sent Jesus to pay the price in our place.  

So at times, the frustration and loneliness and longing for just loving physical touch can feel overwhelming and be very hard to bear–but then I think of what marriage is, what a covenant commitment means, and how God loved me (His Bride) when I was committing adultery.  And with His help, I can endure this small trial here.  

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3 thoughts on “When people say “God is my Husband” or “Jesus is Enough”

  1. May you find strength in your situation. Your thoughts are helpful no doubt.

    When a spouse is ill , seriously ill the vows really come to mind to test the ‘metal’ of our commitment to keep our word to GOD .

    God keeps his word to us.Thankfully we can find strength to submit to Him and resist the Devil . We can sustain putting many of those desires to ‘sleep ‘ while we serve our spouse who may not be able to function as we had always thought.

    A husband who is not willing to love his wife is losing out on a great priviledge to discover all that the one flesh relationship has to offer.

    The man who is healthy but in rebellion is going to be accountable because he was the one who ASKED God for a wife ..and God granted him ONE woman . One woman is more than enough for several lifetimes to experience what marriage and a wife is meant to .

    God is the husband of the

    I honor your taking up this circumstance you find yourself in caring for an ill spouse . It is difficult being in a marriage relationship even in the best of times. I hope you have some people who will nurture and give you comfort during this time. A hug is healing from a sister in Christ …perhaps not a brother in Christ as you say our sexual needs are so close to the surface and close relationships with any of the opposite sex will bring even more heartache and difficulties.

    I commend your resolve.

    One of the ways SOME spouses dismiss their part in marriages when they are fully able to fulfill their responsibilities is to have something of the same kind of attitude.

    Believing my faith in Christ was all I needed my own husband withdrew and created his own separate life. He was often informed of being ‘missed’ as he was gone so much or refused to go with me to anything . I would say ‘ I did not get married to be alone or to go everywhere alone’ ….He simply made his own second life selfishly and justified himself that I was ‘happy’ and ‘fulfilled’ with our children and my faith.

    He created his own lack and discontent because he would not take upon himself the CHARGE that GOD pronounces upon the husband’s jurisdiction to nurture, love and learn his wife.

    This is rebellion or as the word says .”He who KNOWS to do right and does not do it it is sin.”

    So it seems many will say ,,”Hey get GOD to do it ‘ while it is their responsiblity to fulfill.

    After all NO OTHER man can or should do for me what my husband is not interested in learning to do and learning to enjoy doing.

    He missed a LOT of what marriage and family had to offer and truely traded his blessings for a bowl of pottage…or maybe a better term would be husks …as with the Prodigal …..I pray he will have his heart open soon.

    In the meantime I miss what GOD provided for me in marriage yet I have to endure and while waiting I am learning as I delve into study of the Word .

    I grieve for husband’s who have cheated themselves out of the many blessings and the maturity they were intended to have when they first stood upon the threshold of marital one flesh living .

    The crucible of marriage puts to death the selfish soul of those willing to enter in . If not the deceptions of this world are close at hand to steal , kill and destroy .

    I pray your strength will continue which we receive from Him who is the WORD of GOD and that you will dine daily at the heavenly fare of the bread that came down from heaven.

    Healing for you , your husband and your marriage and family …as I pray for all who are suffering this difficult time.

    Romans 8…could not just post one or two verses ,..it is so deeeelicious!

    8 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.

    2 For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death.

    3 For what the law could not do, in that it was weak through the flesh, God sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and for sin, condemned sin in the flesh:

    4 That the righteousness of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.

    5 For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit.

    6 For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace.

    7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.

    8 So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God.

    9 But ye are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, if so be that the Spirit of God dwell in you. Now if any man have not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his.

    10 And if Christ be in you, the body is dead because of sin; but the Spirit is life because of righteousness.

    11 But if the Spirit of him that raised up Jesus from the dead dwell in you, he that raised up Christ from the dead shall also quicken your mortal bodies by his Spirit that dwelleth in you.

    12 Therefore, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh.

    13 For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live.

    14 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.

    15 For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father.

    16 The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God:

    17 And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together.

    18 For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.

    19 For the earnest expectation of the creature waiteth for the manifestation of the sons of God.

    20 For the creature was made subject to vanity, not willingly, but by reason of him who hath subjected the same in hope,

    21 Because the creature itself also shall be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God.

    22 For we know that the whole creation groaneth and travaileth in pain together until now.

    23 And not only they, but ourselves also, which have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption, to wit, the redemption of our body.

    24 For we are saved by hope: but hope that is seen is not hope: for what a man seeth, why doth he yet hope for?

    25 But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it.

    26 Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.

    27 And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God.

    28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

    29 For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren.

    30 Moreover whom he did predestinate, them he also called: and whom he called, them he also justified: and whom he justified, them he also glorified.

    31 What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?

    32 He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?

    33 Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God’s elect? It is God that justifieth.

    34 Who is he that condemneth? It is Christ that died, yea rather, that is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us.

    35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?

    36 As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.

    37 Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.

    38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,

    39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

    Hugs

  2. I’m honored that I got you thinking. I believe that sometimes just talking about these things can validate the pain others experience and have no safe place to go with their pain. Yes, Jesus hears and knows, but it’s comforting to know that we are not always unique in our suffering and can encourage one another to stay pure and true and seeing others struggle but hold to God’s Word in spite of the pain, bolsters our own courage in the journey. Blessings to you!

  3. Thank you for your reply , It is something to ‘bear one another’s burdens’ I have few who ‘weep with ‘ about this because it is too difficult to share …people are not equipped in general to deal effectively with this kind of thing . Until you deal with it yourself …which none of us want to …it simply is beyond knowing …

    May your life be filled with encouragements that you will recognize from the hand of the Lord no matter who may be the one to bring it …He is indeed the only one who can really bear with us through these things…yet we are privileged to have some like hearted yokefellows ….I look forward to the time when ‘every tear will be dried’ and we will no longer have the kinds of trials we experience here in this fallen world.

    He endured the slanders and the slings and arrows of those who knew not what they were doing ….I am SURE the wounds hurt beyond words yet He laid His life down as you pointed out when we were not even aware of what He did …and still may not fully realize the pain He suffered not just physically but emotionally .

    I see his tears he cried at the seplucher of his friend Lazarus were not FOR Lazarus but for the evidence of those who did not believe in the power of GOD to bring Lazarus forth from the grave.

    I laughed at a teacher I once heard who pointed out that Jesus ‘pet name’ for His followers was ‘YE of little faith’ …I am inclined to ask then for ‘more faith’ but I am cautious since it seems that how that is fulfilled is in these various ‘trails ‘ …which sometimes feel so overwhelming.

    I recall in the past my younger days of beginning to follow Him most tasks seemed to be more in the activities of life …overcoming joblessness, decisions about what to DO …whereas the more challenging ones seem to be in the area of attitude and emotional overcoming.

    I suppose if we are to be AS our master we should have realized that we would undergo some of what HE went through and at least like Paul I have yet to suffer ‘blood’ as some have had to do .

    I pray your service to your Lord through caring for your husband will be scattered throughout by indications of His care for you …and through helps by way of others coming along side.

    Relief for caregivers is so needed . I pray for you to have someone come to help and spell your efforts and for you to have a refreshing as they do …Those who help are also taught and nurtured by the Lord in their offering.

    Hugs

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